Goddess, I was a first class bitch in class today. Hormones are a mess, so I’m angry and depressed at the same time. I feel like a freakin’ blimp. And then I go to Studio Video class and yet again, instead of learning how to work equipment, someone wants me to be talent in their skit. I hate what I look like. I hate it more when my size is forever immortalized in pictures or video. Then, my costume is a wide piece of fabric with a hole cut in the center. I nearly ran from the room in embarrassment. It really doesn’t matter if anyone else thinks I look like a cow, I felt like one. Plus, the script, which no one thought was as funny as she thought it was, had political POVs and I have different political views than the writer, so I got angry and bitchy. I felt bad afterward, but she left before I could apologize. Unfortunately by the time I remember I’m having hormonal stuff, I’ve made an ass of myself. So ridiculous.

Still…I wish they’d stop making me talent, I don’t care if they think I read it well, I really don’t wan’t to see my fat body on the big screen in class anymore.