Writing It Out

January 21st
1:32 PM

1 note

What am I going to do?

I just received a letter about my financial aid. It says I am no longer eligible for aid because I have over 90 units, but doesn’t specify if they are taking away this semester’s aid that I was told I was going to get or if I just can’t get any more later. It says it’s on a TERMINATIONS status, so I think it means they’ve taken it away. I won’t be able to go to school and finish my AA if they have taken it away. I don’t understand. Of course I have over 90 units, I had over 80 when I applied for the aid last semester. I have no other way of finishing this degree. If they take the aid away I am back to sitting around the house with no reason to get up in the morning. I was finally happy again.

**I should probably add that I am hormonal and particularly dramatic, but this is devastating even without the hormones.**

1:58 AM

3 notes

Source

School started this week on Tuesday. We had Monday off for Martin Luther King Day, so I still have one more class I haven’t gone too yet (But it’s drawing and comp, part b to the a I took in the fall, so I already know what to expect). I have three Mass Comm classes for my major: electronic movie making, sound recording and adv studio/video recording (a total of 9 units). I have to have 12 units to keep my grant money and there were no more mass comm classes available for me to take this semester, so I took drawing again (only 2 units) and decided to take beginning guitar. I have a guitar, it was my mom’s and it has a funky 60’s case with yellow, green and white pop-style flowers. I need to buy a capo later, but the book at least was only $6. I am taking a break from practicing the guitar right now because my fingertips hurt :( Apparently they should start to callous in 2 weeks and it won’t hurt as much so I can practice for longer intervals. I’ve wanted to learn to play guitar for a long time: my parents bought me a child’s guitar years ago, but no classes. Having a class means I have to practice, so maybe I’ll learn enough to keep it up after the semester ends.

The biggest problem I have had is my sleep schedule. My body does not want to sleep at night, so I end up napping in the car between classes. However the napping means I ma not writing between classes like I want. Gotta stop napping so much, maybe I’ll sleep at night.

July 31st
8:00 PM

1 note

I am growing concerned. I have not gotten any interviews for jobs this year, and the unemployment (though it claims to be for a year) is running out with the next check. I am hoping to get an extension, but who knows.

I decided to go to school again and applied for a grant and a fee waiver. Now I could probably get the grant, but I’ve been told I do not qualify for the waiver. I can’t sign up for classes without the waiver, because I do not have income. If I can’t sign up for classes, I won’t get the grant and I still can’t pay for classes. The app for the waiver does not ask if you are employed or not. It does ask if you are on general assistance; does unemployment count as general assistance? I do not know. Their “help” does not help at all with that question. So tomorrow I take a trip to the financial aid office and find out if it does and can I re-apply?

Also, I hate those stupid personality tests you have to take for the most mundane of jobs nowadays. I used to get jobs without those tests and do just fine at the jobs, my bosses liked me and I had no problems. Now those things I like big hurdles I am apparently incapable of surmounting. Evidently answering the questions truthfully is wrong, but somehow lying on them is asinine to me.

I really just need to create my own career. Relying on the rest of the world for any opportunities, or income, is beginning to feel like running into a brick wall over and over again. Isn’t that the simplified definition of insanity?